Dear sweet common people, pour yourselves a cup of tea, and lend a hopeful ear to my wisdom. I wish to educate you a bit.
Have you heard of William E. Gladstone? He was Prime Minister of England in the late nineteenth century. You Americans were off on your own by then, doing your own thing, but I’m sure you kept tabs on your Homeland. Gladstone, known as the “Grand Old Man,” was known for championing the Home Rule Bill, which would have given Ireland self-rule, and has been cited by such great statesmen as Winston Chruchill as an inspiration. But I tell you about WIlliam Gladstone because of another reason.
These words he spoke in 1865, and with them I could not possibly agree more:
If you are cold, tea will warm you. If you are too heated, it will cool you. If you are depressed, it will cheer you. If you are excited, it will calm you.
This, dear commoners, is how I feel about tea. I hope you do as well. It soothes the soul. It warms the heart. It is everything you need. Liquid wisdom, the Chinese call it. And as you continue your walk though life, I hope you have a cup of tea by your side. Because the answers you are always seeking — to the questions you don’t even know to ask — are at the bottom of that cup.
It seems everyone is always talking about coffee. In the movies, everyone is carrying a brown paper cup, jokes are made about how they take coffee; on television boys ask girls out for “a drink or a cup of coffee.” It’s as if tea doesn’t even exist! well, I am here to tell you that it does! And here’s proof:
Oh how you have missed me, no doubt. I pity you all. stirring your big cups of tea, scanning this tea blog in the hopes of seeing my cartooned face smiling back at you with a bit of good information about the best type of tea. How disappointed you must have been!
I’m afraid I have been a bit busy this past month with some sort of labour dispute among my serfs. Nothing I can’t handle–or rather, that my men can’t handle. (I try not to dirty my hands with even knowing the details of such distasteful matters). But it has resulted me in having to hole up in my fortified tower here in there with just a few barrels of my favorite loose leaf teas and couple of thick volumes of my life story.
But now that you’re boringly American holiday has passed, like my little uprising, we can focus on my favorite holiday — Christmas.
I received a notice from one of my amore loyal subjects that there was a wonderful video about tea that I should see, and now I shall share it with you.
This fun little ditty is well-animated, reminding me of the animation of my countrymen the Monty Python gang or something like that. On top of that, there are many references to my beloved country (and your less beloved homeland), both visual and otherwise. And of course, it is about my favorite subject: tea.
So enjoy this wonderful video. I know I did. And have a cup of tea. For the love of God.
As your quaint tradition of being thankful comes ever closer, I thought you might perhaps enjoy an amusing story about something I know all tea drinkers consider quite precious, and of which they are ever grateful: tea bags.
Now many people say that loose leaf tea is the superior way to make tea. But even they must admit that it’s much more convenient to carry a bunch of tea bags than it is to always be cleaning out your tea infuser all the time. But did you know how tea bags came to be? It’s a bit of a funny story, actually.
Well, I’d say you’ve done it now. This morning with my morning tea, (I’m sure you don’t have to wonder what kind of tea it asat this point…and if you do, well shame shame!), I notice that you’ve gone and elected (the word is such a strange one to me!) yourself a new President. Good for you.
It is no secret that a good cup of tea is one of my favorite things. They didn’t name Earl Grey Tea after me for nothing, after all. (It wasn’t a catchy name when I first told them what to call it, BTW, and a bit of resistance had to be stamped out quickly and some say viciously.)
But as much as I enjoy a good strong black tea (though I like green tea and white teas as well, and don’t let anyone tell you differently), I do also enjoy a bit of the nectar of the gods, the fruit of the vine. And in that frame of mind, I shall tell you a bit about how tea is like wine. Read full entry! »
All right, so that slogan has already been taken; but no one will argue that in this hot weather, it is important to have a nice glass of iced tea. It cools the body while stimulating the mind. It will certainly be the most popular drink of choice at all your summer shindigs.
Chances are that you’ve had a glass of iced tea before. We are not on Mars. But I know good tea—iced or otherwise—and it is my whim to alert you to some of my favorite ways of brewing come delicious iced tea. Read full entry! »
Hullo common tea lovers. I’ve once again idly thought of a reason to tarry with you once again. As I was verbally abusing my servant for making hot teawhen it’s still quite warm outside and iced tea would be much more pleasant (don’t worry about him, he’s used to it, it’s for his own good), I noticed that the telly was advertising for a new film.
It seems to be called “The Duchess,” and it purports to be about Georgina Cavendish–a close personal friend of mine from way back, as I’m sure I don’t have to tell you. If there’s one thing you ex-colonists can’t get enough of, it’s British History, am I right?
I, Earl of Grey, have taken a few moments out of my precious schedule to allow you to bask in my presence. My hot tea was too hot, and I have a moment or two before Henry pulls out the loose leaves and hands it to me. So I thought I would tell you a little bit about…yourselves.
You’ve no doubt thought as you shopped for your favorite flavored tea—“Why do I enjoy flavored tea so much?”
I have wondered that very thought. “Why do Americans prefer flavored tea?” And I think I have the solution. Heed my wisdom, for I shan’t repeat it.
